Kenyan Madness Abroad

Will this turn out to be the elusive outlet for me to unleash my creative genius on an unsuspecting world? Or is it destined to be nothing more than a hi-tech pen and pad chronicling the ramblings of a delusional mind? You be the judge ... Just so ya know there's a disclaimer: This blog contains strong language and some adult situations. Viewer discretion is advised.

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Location: United States

Cultural, expressive, thoughtful dude. It's not all good though coz I am also an internet addict, and a sometime stalker too. But I am happy to say I am in therapy for the internet thing :)

Wednesday, October 23

Mchongoano Pt 2

1. Umeunga mpaka unatoanga ngozi ya miwa ka ndizi

2. ati nyinyi wadosi mpaka mkienda ocha mnabeba nguo kwa flash disk

3. naskia nyi mmesota mpaka munapika chapo side moja

4. wewe ni mweusi mpaka wameandika “scratch to reveal” kwa I.D yako

5. Weh ni mnono mpaka bed yako ikona zgwembe.

6. Wewe ni mweusi tu sana mpaka ukitupiwa mawe zinarudi zikisema hazijakucheki.

7. una masikio big ukiwa mtoi ulikuwa unabebwa kaa trophy

8. Kwenu muko wengi mpaka buda wenu ametengeza roundabout kwa hao.

9. We ni mweusi hadi ukipita karibu na plants zinadhani ni Dark Stage photosynthesis

10. unakichwa bigi hadi ukidream unadream 7 in 1

11. nilisikia ati kwenyu mkowengi hadi mbuyu wako akimcome badala ya kusema habari yenu anasema my fellow Kenyans!

12. Dame yako amekonda hadi yeye huchungulia kwa key hole na macho zote mbili.

13. Nyumba yenu imejengwa na ugali, wezi wakikuja wanasema “fungueni ama tutarudi na sukuma”

14. nyumba yenu imetengenezwa na matope.. mpaka wezi wakija wanasema.. “FUNGUA AMA TUIKOJOLEE!”..

15. wewe ni mjinga… mpaka ulirepeat kunyonya.

16. ASUBUHI ASUBUHI githeri na colgate.

17. Radio yenu imezoea kisapere mpaka instead ya kusema kiss 100 inasemanga “mumunya igana”

18. Naskianga ati damu yako ni tamu jo, hadi mosquito zinakamingi na mandazi..!!

19. Ati uko na mdomo biggy hadi ungekuwa muimbaji ungetoa collabo pekee yako.

20. we ni mchoyo hadi unaflash.999.makarao

21. uko na ngozi tight mpaka ukikunja ngumi macho infunguka.

22. Doggy yenu imebeat hadi iki bark lazima ijishikilie kwa ukuta.

23. kwenu ni ocha sana hadi sms ikifika unaipanguza vumbi

24. Ati wewe ni mweusi hadi huwezi kuwa na a BRIGHT idea.

25. Manzi yako ni mkonda hadi mukienda kupanda mat unaambiwa”pole buda lakini hatubebi miwa”

26. Una kichwa kubwa mpaka dream zako zushow in dolby surround.

27. Ati wewe ni kichwa ngumu hadi ulikataa kuzaliwa uchi!

28. We ni mnono hadi ukikunywa novida huwezi get lifted!

29. kwenu nyinyi ni wezi hadi Ali baba and the 40 thieves walikam attacho kwenu.

30. Ati phone yako ni ya zamoh,ukitumiwa sms unaishia kucollect kwa post office.

31. msee ni mweusi hadi difference yake na midnight ni 11:59.

32. ati ndoto zako ni noma mpaka zi huanza… previously on..

33. We ni mnatty hadi ukiswitch on nokia yako,badala ya hizo mikono kusalimiana,ziugota.

34. wewe ni mrefu hadi una magoti tatu kama ngamia

35. Nyinyi ni wadosi hadi dogi zenu zina dogi za kuzichunga.

36. wewe ni mfupi hadi unabebanga fifty bob kama mabati.

37. wee ni mnono hadi ukikalia novel zinakuwa short stories!

38. chuo yenu ni farthest by the time unafika ni 2nd term!

39. Manzi yako ame beat hadi badala ya kupelekwa extreem make ova, alipelekwa panel beating!

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

we ni mkonde hadi utumia lastoplas badala ya always

1:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

mko toppest

8:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Asubuhi asubuhi uji na ballgum

10:14 AM  

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